What’s my type?

Recently I came to think how people sometimes end up doing something or being with someone who they could swear they would. Life is full of surprises and usually we are the ones that can surprise ourselves the most.

So on that note, today I wanted to talk about types. Do people really have a type when it comes to romantic and sexual attraction? I know it is not just me that falls for someone who is out of normal characteristics that my type is made of. And now the second time around that situation really made me stop and question do I really have a type or any preference at all when it comes to dating someone, since I never actually fell for my type. It’s a curious thing isn’t it. I never liked blue eyes but my last 2 relationships (out of total 3 in my life) involved a partner that has blue eyes. Yes, yes, I know they are just eyes but that is a characteristic that in no way corresponds with my type, in fact it is the pure opposite.

I have no idea when the cliche of liking someone for who they are became true, that cliche is something we all always wanted to believe but never really did. You get what I mean? The whole WHO THEY ARE IS IMPORTANT became bullshit ever since the entire dating world changed. You usually meet your ‘partner’ in a bar or a club, or you just swipe right 😂, how the hell could you know who that person is? Everything sped up and getting into relationships wasn’t an exception either. But maybe we are getting back to how things were before all this fast craziness. Maybe looks really got replaced by conversations and real interests. I guess when you seek a deeper connection with someone your type isn’t important or even it is the last thing you think about.

A few weeks ago I heard an interesting theory that the person in our life is never the wrong person for us, only we can be the wrong version of ourselves and the more I thought about it the more I started to agree with that view. People in our life come and go all the time, and not to think they are in our lives for some reason that is specific and unique to us and who we as people are is crazy. In this view the definition of a type has blurred lines and it is basically irrelevant. Recent events in my life showed me that sometimes you get exactly what you need even thought you might never came to think you need that in the first place.

That would be it for today and this post. Thank you for reading this post and I hope you’ll see me in my next one whenever that will be!

http___signatures.mylivesignature.com_54493_157_FA4B4A182DF1537DBD53322870A28D28

Social media:
Tumblr: girlonfire-youtube-lover
Instagram: @smalltownblogger 
Email: medicmagdalena@gmail.com

Advertisements

My Sex and the City

Every once in a while I get this insane idea to write a Carrie Bradshaw like post. Even though I am kind of a lifestyle blogger, relationships and sex were never my forte, actually, those topics were delicately avoided in my posts over last few years. Since I am starting a process of getting out of my comfort zone and trying new things for myself I thought this post could be a good first step on that road when it comes to my career in writing.

Carrie always puts her and her friend’s experiences in her posts so I am going to try to broadly do just that. We already talked about how this summer turned out to have a bit more serious note by me terminating a relationship to be in a better place of mind and we also talked about the importance of healthy selfishness when it comes to your own happiness and mental health in general. Now we are going to talk about making yourself happy in other ways.

Since I have terminated that relationship a few things happened along the way that brought me to the door of opening a new relationship fairly soon to ending of the first one. Of course, me being a crazy over-thinker and all-blames-on-me person, I got a bit puzzled by what my next move should be. I was at a huge crossroad that was problematic for numerous reasons. I knew how it would look and I didn’t want it to look like I left one person for another because I really didn’t. Also, I didn’t want to lose a chance for something that could be so good and so perfect because of a tricky timing that was only tricky because I felt like I was being promiscuous for something that just isn’t like that. What I was afraid of was that other people would think that I am cold and quite simply a bitch. And somewhere along the line of me over thinking that little voice popped into my mind.

Is this making you happy?  – An easy question isn’t it.
Yes! – Even easier answer.
Then why are you feeling guilty for wanting to be happy? Isn’t everybody’s aspiration in life to BE HAPPY?! At that point, I decided to let the moment decide for me and not to limit myself to anything. If it’s bound to happen it will! And it did. It really was a moment. A pure moment in which I thought to myself Yeah, this is it, this is right…  For what it takes, I do feel a little guilty still, but not for making the decisions that I made because I still stand by them.

On a slightly different note now. This summer is a really fast summer. A lot of things happened in a short period of time. I can see my friends trying to find themselves, exploring what life has to offer and being open to new experiences just as I am. And nothing makes me happier than that. We are truly growing up and having fun doing so, finally. Mistakes were made, but who cares really? Rules are to be broken and mistakes are to be made. We are here to find and create ourselves, and to have fun by fucking up ( something that I and my friends were reminded recently).

Nothing should be taken too seriously especially when we talk about sex and relationships in your early days. Nobody really expects you to have your life together, so you shouldn’t either. It is not a crime to enjoy yourself, however, you might want (of course if you aren’t hurting others in a way that is legally considered a crime 😆 ). And also it’s summer, what is better than being young in summer? A lot of things, but it’s still too awesome of an opportunity not to take it while you still can!

http___signatures.mylivesignature.com_54493_157_FA4B4A182DF1537DBD53322870A28D28

Social media:
Tumblr: girlonfire-youtube-lover
Instagram: @smalltownblogger 
Email: medicmagdalena@gmail.com

 

 

 

In general

Saturday morning. 7 AM. Great storm and rain everywhere. Just as it was on that same date 18 years ago when I was born. Coincidence? I don’t think so.

The weather made a full circle in those 18 years to welcome me to something that is legally looked at as adulthood. Even though I woke up feeling just as I do every morning, tired and sleepy 😉 , nature made its best effort to remind me of this event that happens only once in your lifetime, oppose to 40th birthday which you can have multiple times 😀 !

I was blessed to be born in an amazing family that spoils me to death with both, attention and presents. I am blessed to have made wonderful friends along the way who are my strength and ultimate support. And last, but certainly not the least, I was too blessed by meeting my partner in life and crime this young and to have that kind of love this early.

No matter the circumstances that made my life hard and at some times unbearably painful I am grateful for and I appreciate everything that happened to me because those things have brought me to this moment. They brought me these people in my life and prepared me for everything that will happen next.

In past few years I have grown so much as a person. I became brave enough to live my true self and met my partner who helped me to make ease with my appearance and finally like the way I look. I earned my confidence, I learned to love and to be loved. I got calmer, my anxiety attacks are not so common anymore. I am funnier, and I have no idea how that happened.  I changed my style to meet how I am feeling inside. A lot more happened, a lot more growth, a lot more happiness.

I guess that you learn how to be happy and how to feel the happiness surrounding you as the years go by. You learn to appreciate everything that has happened and not to fear the things that are going to happen. I don’t have a magic recipe, no one does. But I know one thing, with the right people everything is easier. 

This post is a thank you to all those people who make my life easier, better, funnier, prettier. To the people who have brought me back the childlike will to live and to explore all the things this life has to offer, to be happy for what is going to happen and for what has already happened. Thank you from the bottom of my small heart, I love you! 

 

http___signatures.mylivesignature.com_54493_157_FA4B4A182DF1537DBD53322870A28D28Social media:
Tumblr: girlonfire-youtube-lover
Instagram: @smalltownblogger_m
Email: medicmagdalena@gmail.com

 

Why I love Christmas?/ Christmas series 2016

In my last year’s Christmas with Small Town Blogger I expressed my love for Christmas, but never really explained why do I actually love Christmas. So, for the first post in my this year’s series I will try to explain exactly that!


So my story starts two Christmases ago. A dark time in my life. The time I did talk about before. If you have been with me since the beginning you would know that I have anxiety for many years now. And also that I suffered from depression previously, 2/3 years ago.

As a child everyone loves Christmas, whether it is for the Santa, gifts or family time. But later the whole magic of Christmas bursts like a bubble and now all of sudden you treat Christmas like any other day. But I kind came to my senses properly because I was depressed. Let me explain it further and you might understand what I mean.

While I was depressed of course I try to hide it away from my family and friends. (Not a good decision by any means but it is what I did.) So, I was empty inside for the longest time and to keep any will to live I began to obsess with Christmas. I was all in with the decorations, gifts, the Christmas spirit. And at one point it actually started making me kind of happy, as happy as a person with depression can be, obviously.

I blame it on Christmas magic. So in that honour I still go all in every year after that one. And I will for as long as I keep that memory, keep in mind I do not forget easily. My Christmas tradition came from  one of the darkest parts of my life and for me to make it into something good took a lot of strength. And yeah, that is my reason. Do you have yours?

http___signatures.mylivesignature.com_54493_157_FA4B4A182DF1537DBD53322870A28D28Social media:
Tumblr: girlonfire-youtube-lover
Instagram: @smalltownblogger_m
Email: medicmagdalena@gmail.com

Funny little feeling

There is this funny little feeling creeping inside of everyone’s mind. Sooner or later we all get a chance to experience it first handedly. Is it a curse or a gift? Can it even be called anything else but a feeling?

Jealousy. Strong. Cruel. Unnecessary?

There are a few types of jealousy, but today let’s talk about relationships.

Jealousy. A show of caring and love, not wanting to loose someone. Or simply our own insecurities and fears of being replaced and not being good enough? Probably a mix of both, but then why is it so deadly? Why does it make us do things we never thought we would do before? It really does bring the worst in us. Being overly protective, suspicious, angry, untrusting; sometimes to the point of aggression (it may be just passive-aggressive acts, but still). It is crazy to think from what emotions has this feeling been created; anger, sadness, disgust. And yet we associate it with love. Funny little feeling indeed!

http___signatures.mylivesignature.com_54493_157_FA4B4A182DF1537DBD53322870A28D28

Social media:
Tumblr: girlonfire-youtube-lover
Instagram: @smalltownblogger_m
Email: medicmagdalena@gmail.com