Word flow

Do you ever have an urge to write something and you have no idea what to write about. I have that feeling right now so I am just going to keep on writing like I know what I’m doing.

I am staring to long at this flickering line that waits for me to put a letter on this blank virtual paper, so acknowledging that fact seemed like a good idea at the begging of this sentence, now not so much but I will keep going. Yeah, I forgot to mention is 2 AM and I am working early, but who cares, right? Right now I am deciding on which path to take this post, serious one or sarcastic but I guess I will find out that in the end. Also right now in my life I am in period of finding and creating myself as a person and one more important thing accepting some things I was so afraid of. Do you want to know what difference accepting those things made in my life? Oh, too bad, you are going to find out any way. I am happier with myself and more comfortable than ever. I feel freer, lighter and I feel more hopeful which is something I never thought I would say.
But in another, darker, note I am afraid that with winter my feelings from last year will come back and I am definitely not ready for another period of suicidal, hopeless, empty life full of guilt for acting I am ok that I once knew as depression.
Forget about that, if you can, and let us talk about what does the future for this blog look like. At this point only thing I know for sure is that you are going to get an amazing and huge photography post from my travels in October. And also I signed up for the September’s Writing 101 course so that should also bring out some interesting posts. I have a few ideas in my head right now which need to be prioritized and presented to you probably at the second part of September.

Wow, what happened to this post? Words and thoughts flowing from all around my brain. I guess I should go before I admit to you my deepest, darkest secrets. I am afraid of the dark and birds. I am p… Noup, it already too late!

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SO GOOD BYE FOR NOW, MY FRIENDS (if anyone is even reading)

Weird diary for the month of July 

This is quite literally a journey thourgh my mind, it’s not a very safe place so consider yourself warned!


2nd of July 

16:25
I don’t know how but it always seem like everything bad is my fault. 

4th of July

23:22
It makes me so angry that I ignore my intuition and instinct. It’s like I know I am going to be hurt so badly, but still do it. Am I a masochist?

6th of July

22:42
I am one of those people who cry when they get angry and that is so frustrating because I look like a fool. I could be yelling at you about how mad I am and cry simultaneously. And after I’m done I usually start to sob even more. It’s so crazy. Also I read on Tumblr that these kinds of people are the most dangerous so I’m also afraid of myself. INSANE!

9th of July

18:47
I hate summer. I know what you think, oh the heat, bikinis, depilation etc. It’s not even that. Summer is the season were I always break all of my promises to myself. And that is connected to me doubting myself more and thinking I am worthless. SO I PRETTY MUCH SPEND MY SUMMER PARTYING! (that’s pure sarcasm if you didn’t catch it)

11th of July

23:55
Oh God, I just realized a few days ago that I am a total control freak and when I told that to one of my friends she was like I know. How did I miss this? I mean, I have been considering myself a perfectionist for a long time, but a control freak? That is totally new to me!

14th of July

16:41
I hate that someone who is a pretty bad person and acts like they are best at everything and like he/she is better than anyone, thinks I am the same way just because they don’t like me or the fact that I actually stand up against them when everyone else is too afraid.

17th of July

16:47
Summer, tanning and beaches are overrated.

19:12
I am constantly afraid that my depression is going to come back as soon as this summer finishes.

19th of July

18:59
I love when I notice how much I have grown as a person and how has my style changed within these few years.

21st of July 

01:21

It is so great when you finally admit something that you have been repressing for years to yourself even though you might aren’t ready to tell everyone. It is so great to feel comfortable within yourself, more than I could ever begin to express!

23rd of July

19:52

It’s amazing how one thing or a person can make you day better or worse. 

25th of July

18:00
How is it possible for me to leave everything until the last moment and then still do everything on time?

29th of July

00:25
I can’t believe how much I feel different from what I felt half a year ago. It’s like I’m a totally different person. And it’s not only that, I feel more at peace with my self and my mind setting so that’s good but it seems that good presents a weird feature in my life.

19:26
How is it possible that I am still clueless about what is flirting and what is not?


  • That will be it for this Weird Diary. I just thought it would be interesting to see how my mind works on different days and in different time periods. If you like this check out my first Weird Diary here and if you decide to do your own version of this please link me so I can check it out! Thank you for reading.

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SO GOOD BYE FOR NOW, MY FRIENDS (if anyone is even reading)